religulous

People wanting to convert me to their religion are following me everywhere. Whether it be the stern armageddon warnings from the globally warm & aware, or the vegetotaltarianists, or the jehovahs witnesses, or that one wiccan girl...

Seriously people. First of alls, I don't care to hear any more about global warming. That was SOOOoooo 2005. Second, I am not going to go on an all vegetarian cruise with you. I don't think I would like a cruise, but if I had to go on a cruise, my one comfort would be the food. Don't take that away from me. I'm glad you don't eat meat but please leave me alone with my spaghetti at the lunch table. Besides, my spaghetti doesn't even have meat in it. Third, I don't like your creepy Jesus-with-open-arms leaflets and the inspirational ditties written by D-list celebrities in your pamphlets. Fourth, I'm not coming to your "circle" to praise your goddess. goddessessess... yah. No. Besides I don't look good in dark green colors with flowy ruffly long skirts.

You know, I'm having a hard time remembering a time where a Christian came up and witnessed to me. I think the last time was in junior college when a gideon handed me a Bible at the entrance to campus. Before that, I think, never?